Silence

I am a selfish person. And I steal.

Selfish not in material things, but in my thoughts and words. All my ideas I keep to myself; instead, I listen to others, rearrange their thoughts, and voice them out as my own. I say alot but they've all been heard before. But since my voice is louder and I can say it with more conviction, people listen to me. But what I say have been heard before. And my thoughts are my own.

I keep them to myself. I keep them to myself because I am afraid. Have you heard of the story of the feathers? When a wise woman told a gossipmonger, tear open this pillow of feathers. The woman did and the feathers flew, blown by the wind. The wise woman then told her, gather them again, to which she replied, I cannot... and those are how words act once they escape the lips. Blown by the wind... far-reaching... powerful...

I keep my words to myself so that I cannot be blamed for them. What i say i can always trace back to someone else. Blame someone else for the results of what I've said. I have no obligation to what I say because they are not my own.

But I know that what I do is not good. Yet to risk putting my own thoughts and ideas into question by others scares me a great deal. And so I choose Silence.

I believe that there is strength in silence. Many times i have wrestled with myself to say things out of emotion, but I choose not to because I know the power of the Word. I choose silence because it is comforting, and is a refuge against a noisy, distracted world. Or perhaps silence has chosen me? Either way, we accompany each other and relish each other's strengths. Because even in my silence I am still a force to contend with. This is evident from the way people look at me, give way to me, acknowledge me despite my not saying anything. And they too fall silent. But there is no discomfort in out silence - just a steadfast camaraderie in knowing that each of is secure in ourselves. And soon, the power of the word equals almost the power of silence.